We’re back with another installment of the Writer’s Workshop. This month, we have the writer who is widely regarded as the greatest rock critic of all times, Lester Bangs. Lester Bangs draws comparison to that other famed Gonzo for living the life he wrote about. You might remember him as the character in Almost Famous played by Phillip Seymour Hoffman. Unlike the “I can fit you on the calendar” interview and research format of today, Bangs befriended his subjects, got to know them inside and out, and likely passed out on their couch.

Hard livin’, alongside such notable partakers as Lou Reed, Captain Beefheart and the Clash, cut Bangs’ life short at the tender age of 33 – a true rock star. Thus, in order to include the wisdom of Lester Bangs here for the Writers Workshop, I’m piecing together this phony interview from a hilarious essay Bangs wrote entitled How to Be a Rock Critic, which is published in the back of the definitive Lester Bangs biography, Let It Blurt, by Jim DeRogatis.
Ryan Dembinsky: What would you say was the best part of the life as a successful rock writer?
Lester Bangs: Well, it almost certainly won’t get you laid. On the other side of the slug, though, are the benefits. The first big one is if you stay in this stuff long enough you’ll start to get free records in the mail, and if you persevere even longer you might wind up on the promotional mailing lists of every company in the nation. On Christmas you don’t have to buy anybody presents if you don’t want to: Just give your mother the new Barbra Streisand album Columbia sent you because Barbra’s trying to relate, your sister one of the three copies of the new Carole Kind that you got in the mail, your sister the Osmond’s double live LP you never opened because you’re too hip… all down the line, leaving you enough money saved to stay fucked-up on good whiskey over the holidays this year.
The final benefit (and for some people, the biggest) is that during most of these stages and at an increasingly casual level as time goes on, you’ll get to hobnob with the Stars. Backstage at concerts, in the dressing room drinking their wine, rapping occasionally with the famous, the talented, the rich, and the beautiful. Most of ‘em are just jerks like everybody else, and you probably won’t really get to meet any real Biggies very often since the record companies don’t need publicity on them so why should they inflict you on them, but you will become friends with a lot of Stars of the Future or at least also-rans.
READ ON for more of Rupert’s sorta-interview with Lester Bangs…