Super Bowl Shuffle- Six Ideal Halftime Shows – Foo Fighters, Black Keys, Bob Seger, Jay-Z, AC/DC, Metallica

Ever since the infamous Nipple Gate fiasco at Super Bowl XXXVIII, the NFL has made it a point to occupy the Halftime Show of its biggest night with well established, universally regarded acts that have ranged from U2 to the Rolling Stones to Prince to Paul McCartney to The Who to Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers to Beyonce to this year’s participants Katy Perry and Lenny Kravitz. Here is a list of six acts we’d most like to see headline future Super Bowl Halftime Shows that haven’t yet played the big show.  This list was put together with keeping in mind the average music fan that would have fun of one of the three days at Bonnaroo and those who don’t know shit about music but would be on the bandwagon for any of these acts by kickoff of the third quarter.  (Wow, that guy Tom Petty is pretty good huh?) We also chose the ideal set-list (medleys in mind) based upon the jock rock factor and mainstream appeal. Listen up Roger Goodell.

1. Foo Fighters: Pearl Jam, Soundgarden, heck, even The Melvins…they all boast the power to level any football stadium to its brass tacks. However, only one survivor from the early 90s Pacific Northwest rock scene boasts the kavorka to move a nation in a way that transcends through the ears of not only the local metal kid in your town, but his stockbroker brother, his elementary school teacher mom, his armchair quarterback father and the family’s zany aunt who still thinks she can turn it loose at the neighborhood rock bar. That man is Dave Grohl, who when flanked with the most fierce lineup of the Foo Fighters in their 20 year history, has the power and the pop to move the everyday masses during the Superbowl halftime show.

Set List: “This Is A Call,”” Everlong,” “My Hero,”” Learn to Fly,” “The Best of You,” “Times Like These”

2. The Black Keys: They are only two men. But when they combine forces, the Black Keys have been known to move seas of people six figures strong with their distinctive blend of garage-born blues rock, as massive sets at such festivals as Bonnaroo, Coachella and Lollapalooza have shown. Indeed it will be interesting to see how they would fare on the world’s largest stage if they ever got the call to play the Superbowl Halftime show. Their robust catalog of AOR hits have already helped to move everything from Molson to Cadillac (even inspiring more than a few shady rip-offs of their trademark sound that saw a flurry of lawsuits in 2012), not to mention landing them seven Grammy awards.  We are confident Dan and Patrick could move a nation anxiouslyawaiting for the third quarter as they nosh on hot wings and taco dip just as efficiently.

Setlist: “Gold on the Ceiling”, “Lonely Boy”, “Fever”, “Tighten Up”, “I’ll Be Your Man”

3. Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band: Now this might be a total fantasy, but just think for a moment if a future Super Bowl pits the Detroit Lions against the Cleveland Browns. It might never ever happen, but purely for the sake of “what if”, just imagine. There is literally no other artist who could be more perfect to headline such a potential Midwestern collision like the Motor City’s own working class hero Bob Seger and his Silver Bullet Band. For literally 50 years, he has reigned supreme as the king of Heartland rock that seems to create a sense of nostalgia in real time with the soulful sweep of his anthemic songwriting. And with so many epic hits to choose from, having this beloved old road dog headline halftime only seems logical as he enters the silver age of his career with 2014’s Ride Out and the memories of those classic Chevy Truck commercials from 1990s still fresh in our heads.

Set List: “Old Time Rock ‘n’ Roll”, “Night Moves”, “Turn the Page”, “Hollywood Nights”, “Like A Rock” “Fire Down Below”

4. Jay-Z: By semantics alone, you would think the only hip-hop act who can pull off the kind of over-the-top spectacle conducive for the Super Bowl would be Kanye West. But Yeezy is far too polarizing a figure for the throngs congregating in front of flat screens across the USA. Jay-Z, on the other hand, is arguably the only rapper tailor-made to headline the Big Show. His wife Beyonce already conquered the halftime stage in 2013. But it would be epic to see the Jigga man become the first proper hip-hop artist to headline the halftime stage by delivering a rapid-fire succession of smashes with his killer touring band behind him and a cavalcade of surprise guests (the man has everyone on speed dial).

Set List: “Hard Knock Life”, “Run This Town”, “Big Pimpin'”, “99 Problems”, “Izzo (H.O.V.A.)”

5. AC/DC: They might be two men down from their classic line-up. But so long as Brian Johnson and Angus Young are still in good, shrill health, AC/DC will continue to charge ahead they way they’ve done for the last 40-odd years. The title of their new album might as well be their mantra: Rock or Bust. And while the tragedy of losing founding guitarist Malcolm Young as to dementia and longtime drummer Phil Rudd to his own deviance were a pair of blows that would level any regular rock band, you are talking about the group who survived the death of their original lead singer by delivering the biggest album of their careers with Back in Black, their studio debut with Johnson. And given the momentum the excellent Rock or Bust has provided for the ever-resilient AC/DC as they embark on their very first tour without Malcolm onstage with them, there would nary be a more greater feat to attest to the unshakable nature of these guys quite like conquering American football’s biggest show like the Australian warlords they are. If we were going for pre-game anthem would there be a better way to rev up a crowd than “Thunderstruck”?

Set List:  “Thunderstruck,””Back in Black”, “Highway to Hell”, “You Shook Me All Night Long”, “Play Ball”, “For Those About to Rock (We Salute You)”.

6.  Metallica: Ask anyone who has hit the weight room hard, and there’s no doubt that Metallica has blared through those ear phones Are they too heavy for the multitudes of Americans who will be sitting down for the Super Bowl? Maybe not – after years of being blasted at Yankee Stadium for closer Mariano Riviera’s entrance to the mound – they do have some family appeal.  But the metal masters, currently working on the proper follow-up to DEATH Magnetic, boast a wide spectrum of intensity. And while the notion of Granny spitting prune juice out of her nose upon the opening riffs of “The Four Horsemen” is definitely a foggy one, the fearsome foursome have enough classic non-thrash material (“Enter Sandman”, “Hero of the Day”) to carry them through the length of a Superbowl halftime show, especially if they break out their cover of Bob Seger ‘ s “Turn the Page”.

 Set List: “Enter Sandman,” One,” “Hero of the Day,” “Seek and Destroy” “For Whom the Bell Tolls” “Where I May Roam”

Compiled by Ron Hart

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