[rating=9.00]
In the opening scene of director James Haslam’s The Con Is On, a woman sits on a park bench across from an elderly nun, who slides her a bag with a brick of cocaine in it. The nun then takes out the brick, and opens one corner before tasting a dab of the white powder. She slides over another bag filled with cash to the woman, who tells her before she leaves “Now don’t fuck this up.”
It’s a perfect pulp moment delivered with near-parodic irreverence, conveniently setting the tone for the next 90 minutes: a color-saturated noir with a delightfully dark sense of humor. Which is the only kind of film that could get away with having a profane, coke-dealing nun in the opening scene. Other than another Bad Lieutenant sequel, maybe.
At the center of the story is Harry (Tim Roth), a hard-drinking gambler who’s fresh from a three-month stint in a Turkish prison. Well, the story’s not so much about Harry as it is about his sizable debt, which he owes to a ruthless British mobster (Maggie Q). In order to pay it off, he and his literal partner-in-crime, Harriet (Uma Thurman, sporting a posh English accent) hatch a scheme to fly to LA and steal a priceless piece of jewelry from Peter’s ex-wife, Jackie (Alice Eve), which was given to her by her new husband, Gabriel (Crispin Glover), a deeply eccentric movie director.
Like, to the point that he holds a miniature chihuahua up to his face and asks it “Are you my enemy?” with all his steely-eyed Gloverian intensity. Making matters even more complicated is Gabriel’s assistant Gina (Parker Posey), who’s delusional to the point she barely seems connected to reality, which gives Posey free reign to show off her physical comedy prowess.
Rounding out the group of miscreants is Sophia Vergara as Gabriel’s leading lady, who also happens to be in love with him, and Stephen Fry as Sidney, a double-crossing gay priest rarely on screen without his oft-shirtless, much younger companion. One thing this movie is not is subtle.
Though it’s packaged like hyper-stylized heist flick, it plays out much more like a madcap comedic farce, which lets Haslam (who co-wrote the script with Alex Michaelides) lean heavy into the absurdity — while the cast seems free to do the same. Resulting in a wildly talented ensemble really embracing their despicable characters. And all this adds up to one simple truth: The Con Is On has all the earmarks of cult-film infamy, and now’s your chance to get in on the ground floor.
The Con Is On is out now in limited theatrical release and on VOD
3 Responses
Pip and Brandon are class acts
nice one..
Did you also get paid by the director to write up this review for this awful movie?! The cast is shockingly well-known but this movie is a giant turd.