Phish Tales: The Braphecy Is Nigh

Why are Taddy Porter futures going through the roof? Why was “bunk molly recipe” the third-most Googled term yesterday (behind Lauren Conrad and Kim Kardashian, of course)? And why can’t I find decent patchwork cloth anywhere within a 200 mile radius? What in the good name of lot mamas is going on here? Could it be…? Dare I say it – THE BRAHPHECY??

Yes, somebody call The Miz people, because I am laying down The Gauntlet. Phish is coming back. ANNOUNCEMENT IMMINENT!!!!!!!onehundredeleven!!!! First came word from the dude who works at a coffee shop in the town where Tom Marshall lives who said that Trey landscaped his house in Washington County with cacti. Then everyone but Fishman issued the infamous “non-denial denial” conformation. You know, like “Oh, we talk a lot. But only about chess.” (Yeah, right.) Then Trey announced that he’s hitting the (holiday) road with his band to test the waters again, I assume. But when two interesting bits of news from outside their camps hit the infowebules, I was forced to compost all of my Naturapet organic dog food: Panic and moe. will be taking time off in 2009.

Unfortunately, the popularity of this scene has dwindled pretty dramatically in recent years. It’s not 1998 anymore where fans can support three or four bands touring simultaneously. There’s just not enough wooks craving kind yummy garlic grilled cheeses in the 2000s, I guess. So it’s clear to me what these two bands are doing: They’re getting off the road to make room for the inevitable Phish Mach 3 (and The Dead, to a lesser extent) reunion. I’ve been a Panic fan since the early ’90s and will remain one to the very end, but longtime Spreadheads have to admit that tickets are much easier to come by these days than they used to be. I can’t imagine that demand will somehow rebound when major competition returns.

The Brahphacey is nigh. So enjoy sharing the groove in 2009, phans.